we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize
