i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
