I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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