He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
