ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
