Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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