If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize