i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
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