I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Randomize
