Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Randomize
