Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
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