You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
That's when you crack a 10am beer
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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