i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
