ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize