Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Randomize