I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize
