so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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