yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
Randomize
