Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
