i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Randomize
