Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
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