Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I think I sprained my soul last night
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
Some dudes just stopped and stared at me peeing in the street for like 5mins, and I yelled HEY. HEY. WANT ME TO SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH? I'LL SHIT ON YOUR CHEST FOR FIVE DOLLARS, PAPI
this is why i love drunk you
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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