Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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