How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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