my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Dignity is for republicans.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
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