Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize