I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Randomize
