Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize
