I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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