i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
