I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Randomize
