Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
I am midnight drunk by noon
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Randomize
