In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Randomize
