It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
