A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Randomize
