Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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