I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
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