dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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