after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
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