All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
