shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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