do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Randomize
