hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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