She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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