There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
