You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Drunk is not a location!
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Randomize
