The panties match.
I'll be right there.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
