she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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