i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Randomize