That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Randomize
