pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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